Cinema Thread, because movies is a stupid word

[Idlehands]

You know, I look at a billion dollar corporation pouring millions of dollars into a project and expect it to be really good as a result. What sort of fucking cretin expects and is then happy with Merely Average from that?

It doesn't have to do anything INNOVATIVE to actually be good. It'd just be nice if they took the Star Wars IP and actually did something with it that merited the Star Wars IP in the first place, and maybe put a few of the millions into making something other than a completely Color-By-Numbers action/hero movie.

Really, the fucking thing could have just as easily been Dungeons and Dragons 8: Medeival Boogaloo, changed the character names, and the whole thing would have just fell in the cookie-cutter script.

your problem is you think Star Wars is a good IP to begin with. That somehow the original movies are some amazing pieces of art. But you're wrong. So it doesn't have some legacy to live up to, except in your own mind. Star Wars was always flash and magic, and not deep story telling with well written characters.

Fucking Ewoks, for christ's sake.

The Star Wars IP is excellent, in the same way that a fitted set of top of the line golf clubs are excellent. They are a great tool to accomplish great things if the wielder knows what the fuck they are doing. I'm playing KOTOR because everything Star Wars from 15 years ago was on sale on Steam for, I shit you not, 'bout tree fiddy. Aside from the Dragon Age-y "real time but all characters are on auto-pilot unless you pause every 3 seconds to tell them what the fuck to do" combat, the game is a fucking masterpiece. It shouldn't be THAT hard to come up with some really fly shit with an IP that involves magical space samurai.

But now EA has killed both BioWare and Star Wars. Because government.

There were even the expanded universe books, that introduced a whole bunch of fun concepts, like "grey" Jedi and some asspull to bring Boba Fett back in the game. But Disney retroactively declared ALL OF THAT SHIT non-canon because it wasn't sterile enough that a 6 year old could understand it and because they apparently hate money, respectively.

Waiting for TLJ to start now. This better not suck.

Exceeded expectations

Good to hear.

A lot of other people in this thread have criticised it (some justifiably so, on reflection), give us your thoughts! I REALLY wanna go see it again now.

Spoiler free. The entire movie other than literally the last 10-15 minutes was predictable, and my wife leaned over and told me the ending "twist" though I didn't see it coming. But the set pieces they used were gorgeous, and that made it an enjoyable ride.

Welcome to the cancer of annual releases. Write a bog standard script that's more interested in checking off a list of standard high spots than anything else, and throw lots and lots of money at making it shiny. Just attach it to literally any IP you can market at nerds or kids and watch the idiot marks on the street convince themselves it's actually a great movie.

It is still a very "safe" movie. It is an action movie with funny parts, which is very "in" right now. The characters are wafer thin archetypes, though Kylo Ren gets more interesting.

See? Standard script. You got your Funny Sidekick, Mentor Figure, a Hero with some sort of Inner Conflict, and a Bad Guy that is either Troubled, Greedy, Psychotic, a literal Nazi, or a combination. Some ancillary authority figure ostensibly on the good guys' side that nonetheless ALWAYS does something incredibly stupid in order to manufacture some additional conflict or drama in a last ditch effort to add Stakes to the happenings because the writers spaced and skipped that step earlier in the Script Toolkit, and probably does so out of some Too Dumb To Live dedication to rules or regulations or some such stupid shit, is optional.

Now, did I just describe Wonder Woman, Thor, Iron Man, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, or Star Wars?

Spiderman shakes the trend by having the Conflicted Hero and the Funny Sidekick be the same guy.

Yeah, but that's only a problem if you expect a multi-million dollar blockbuster from Disney that has a literal generation of expectations to live up to, to be as good or innovative as whoever the next generations Da Vinci of filmmaking is, working on a shoestring budget.

That is, literally retarded. Or from Kentucky it seems, but I repeat myself.

You know, I look at a billion dollar corporation pouring millions of dollars into a project and expect it to be really good as a result. What sort of fucking cretin expects and is then happy with Merely Average from that?

It doesn't have to do anything INNOVATIVE to actually be good. It'd just be nice if they took the Star Wars IP and actually did something with it that merited the Star Wars IP in the first place, and maybe put a few of the millions into making something other than a completely Color-By-Numbers action/hero movie.

Really, the fucking thing could have just as easily been Dungeons and Dragons 8: Medeival Boogaloo, changed the character names, and the whole thing would have just fell in the cookie-cutter script.

wonder if there is anything Dirty Red likes.

For the most exceedingly mild use of the word, I like this movie all right. It is decent. Anyone saying it's any better than that should kill themselves. It's like watching two competent pro wrestlers wrestle for the 58th time. They just hit all the goddamn spots I've seen before 1000 times already, but they don't fuck anything up because they are competent.

It is the Nickelback of movies. The difference is that you marks have been told Nickelback is uncool so you all dislike it to be trendy, but you've been told this was the hip current thing, so you like it to be trendy.

I never liked nickleback.

I like TFA more than TLJ. I enjoyed TLJ but would have been more fun to talk about it with the wife. Which I can't do. So I'm stuck talking to DR. That's like a punch to the head.

TFA wasn't anything revolutionary, obviously. It was basically Another New Hope. Which, given the scenario Disney and the franchise were in, wasn't really a bad thing. They needed a film that just wasn't objectionably bad, and generally in the spirit of Star Wars, in order to get the taste of the prequels out of everyone's mouth. TFA accomplished that nicely. It was a base knock to hopefully start a rally. Followed up by a walk and a fly out.

Two years later, I expect better out of this. And really, TLJ would have went from two to three stars (on the wacky pro wrestling -5 to 5 scale where 2 stars is somehow average) immediately if the bullshit, silly movie-by-marketing-committee shit wasn't in it. They're one GIDP from ending the "rally" and putting Star Wars as a movie franchise back in the ground.

BASEBALL

I watched The Dark Tower last night. Kinda agree with Shane, it was a bit poo. Enjoyed the last half an hour though.

That movie would have been better if they just shot the annoying, useless kid in the first 10 minutes and let the whole thing be Idris Elba battling Evil!McConaughey.

Of course, that fucking twerp might not have been such a goddamn irritant if the trailers ever indicated that the movie was actually about some autistic teenager, instead of the bitching cool magic gunman.

Trap!
Star Wars ip you say. You mean this ?

Chronicles of the Lensmen, Volume 1 (Triplanetary, First Lensman, Galactic Patrol )

[cwd]

@chrisd, yes, like that.

The writers played Mad Libs with the Standard Buddy-Cop Script. Fun but dumb.

[hsilman]

Going to go see Jumanji tonight. Moviepass, remember? Also I have the week off so gotta find something to do.

[DirtyRed]

Going to go see Jumanji tonight. Moviepass, remember? Also I have the week off so gotta find something to do.

Beat NieR: Automata and agree with DR that it is the best game since Witcher 3.

Or watch literally any movie that doesn't have Kevin Hart and Dwayne in it.

[hsilman]

Going to go see Jumanji tonight. Moviepass, remember? Also I have the week off so gotta find something to do.

Beat NieR: Automata and agree with DR that it is the best game since Witcher 3.

Or watch literally any movie that doesn't have Kevin Hart and Dwayne in it.

Almost through the first playthrough of Nier. Called everything so far, but maybe it will catch me off guard. Funny enough, Witcher 3 GOTY was on sale so I got it. Dealing with the Bloody Baron right now.

And I like the Rock, he plays the same character in every movie. I want to see if Jack Black playing a teenage girl is funny or not. I have no idea who Kevin Hart is.

[hsilman]

And I like the Rock, he plays the same character in every movie. I want to see if Jack Black playing a teenage girl is funny or not. I have no idea who Kevin Hart is.

It was sold out when we got there, which in a way is actually more depressing. So we came home and watched a few episodes of Planet Earth II since it just came on Netflix. A+ would still recommend.

[hsilman]

I managed to see Jumanji.

A+, given expectations. Was better/more entertaining than TLJ, which of course had much higher expectations to live up to. All the actors involved did a great job playing their characters(ie jack black played a vapid teenage girl surprisingly well, the rock did a good "alpha nerd" impression) it didn't feel like they were mostly just "playing themselves" as they have a tendency to do. I've never seen Kevin Hart before, so while I liked him(though the weakest of the headliners) I don't know if that's just him.

Really though, enjoyable. Has absolutely nothing to do with the original, which is good IMO. Didn't even feel similar or based on the same premise. Game becomes real, yes, but otherwise plot and mechanics wise it was totally different.

[Allentown]

I still don't know what the green blobs are, and no one can seem to answer it for me.

Wookipedia says heavy turbolaser batteries.

[hsilman]

I still don't know what the green blobs are, and no one can seem to answer it for me.

Space cannonballs?

[DirtyRed]

I still don't know what the green blobs are, and no one can seem to answer it for me.

Space cannonballs?

Those things the Gungans where catapulting at the droid army?

That's right, I just made you remember the prequels.

[ch]

Going to go see Jumanji tonight. Moviepass, remember? Also I have the week off so gotta find something to do.

I’ve been thinking about getting Moviepass. I’ll definitely get it if the Alamo Drafthouse near me takes it when they open.

Love going to the movies (especially now that most places sell beer), but I don’t like paying $10-13 to see marginal stuff like Jumanji.

[hsilman]

Going to go see Jumanji tonight. Moviepass, remember? Also I have the week off so gotta find something to do.

I’ve been thinking about getting Moviepass. I’ll definitely get it if the Alamo Drafthouse near me takes it when they open.

Love going to the movies (especially now that most places sell beer), but I don’t like paying $10-13 to see marginal stuff like Jumanji.

Alamo Drafthouse here in the city started taking it in december or november, so there's a chance.

[Mkgillman]

mother! is really weird and twisted. I'm not entirely sure that I could explain everything that happens in the movie, but I want to watch it again.

[omaniphil]

I saw Wind River last night. I knew what it was going in, but it still emotionally affected me much more than I expected it would. Interesting structural/narrative decision regarding a scene near the end. At first I didn't like it, because it was super uncomfortable, but I think it was a good move overall as it really helped me feel the pain the characters were going through.

Taylor Sheridan is making and writing great movies these days.

[BenM]

Saw Dunkirk last night. Thought it was fantastic.

[aurelius]

Saw Dunkirk last night. Thought it was fantastic.

IMO, has to bee seen in the theater. Saw it in IMAX.

It was glorious.

[BenM]

Saw Dunkirk last night. Thought it was fantastic.

IMO, has to bee seen in the theater. Saw it in IMAX.

It was glorious.

I can imagine. We had planned to see it in the theatre last year but screening times and babysitter availability didn’t line up. Kinda wish we’d made it work.

The dogfights especially would have been amazing. The sound effects were pretty wild even on our not particularly good home theatre. And I really like shows that portray things/situations warts and all without making any kind of judgement. It was beautifully done.

[ch]

Dunkirk was good, but too damned loud in the theater. (Saw it in IMAX as well.)

[mgil]

Black Panther was good. Several obvious plot holes, but a fun movie.

Also: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Letitia_Wright

*cute*

[hsilman]

Saw Darkest Hour. Gary Oldman was good, and so was the actress who played his wife. I liked it, but it's funny a big part of the movie is about Dunkirk. 8/10

Saw Three Billboards etc etc. I liked it, but it is a serious artsy fartsy movie. All the way up its own ass. But still, some good acting for sure. 6.5/10.

Will see Black Panther this week.