The Cube Rule for classifying sandwiches

[Root]

Are we still debating about sandwiches?

This is an interesting take on the issue: http://cuberule.com/

[Wilhelm]

I found this quite amusing.

[iamsmu]

Are we still debating about sandwiches?

This is an interesting take on the issue: http://cuberule.com/

This is great. I keep forgetting about this. I usually run an example in class where we try to define "table." I've never been successful. . . . Trying to define "sandwich" will be so much more fun.

[cgeorg]

Hold on a fucking second. A pie is a quiche/calzone until sliced, at which point the slice becomes a toast/taco? These examples are logically inconsistent - frankly I don't think a non-starch-topped slice of pie can be classified with this rule. It is therefore invalid.

[Cody]

"sushi" category should be the "wrap" category

[cgeorg]

"sushi" category should be the "wrap" category

I've been served calzone wraps. Although if it's then cut down the middle it would become a side-quiche, or just a smaller sushi if it was open ended to begin with.

2 cuts could turn a calzone into 2 quiches and a sushi.

[Hanley]

These examples are logically inconsistent

Yes. Profoundly inconsistent and unsatifying from a mereological perspective.

[mbasic]

well.... remember when Subway used to hollow out the bread like a canoe?

I guess we were all eating tacos and/or quiche back then

[simonrest]

lol at vanilla soy latte being called a three bean soup. I'm stealing that

[Allentown]

lol at vanilla soy latte being called a three bean soup. I'm stealing that

[Idlehands]

well.... remember when Subway used to hollow out the bread like a canoe?

I guess we were all eating tacos and/or quiche back then

[Skander]

Here's what I was thinking about this summer:
An ice cream taco has exactly the same ingredients as a drumstick. So is a drumstick a taco? Also, why are the ice cream tacos so much better? Is it because I hate America?

[tersh]

This is impeccable trolling.

[iamsmu]

I have't had an ice cream taco in a long time. Do they still make them with three different flavors of ice cream in one taco?

[simonrest]

I've never had an ice cream taco but I recently had ice cream cannoli and I highly recommend

[damufunman]

An ice cream taco

The correct terminology is choco-taco.

Is it because I hate America?

You probably do hate America

[tersh]

Also, I want to note that people objecting to class changes upon cutting... that seems proper to me, trolling or not trolling.

A cut changes the topology of certain classes of objects there (sometimes in the strict sense of topology (I think), sometimes not).

ETA: Topologically, I think there's only three classes, yeah?

[KyleSchuant]

Hold on a fucking second. A pie is a quiche/calzone until sliced, at which point the slice becomes a toast/taco? These examples are logically inconsistent - frankly I don't think a non-starch-topped slice of pie can be classified with this rule. It is therefore invalid.

And if you cut a square, it becomes two triangles or two quadrilaterals. It's not logically inconsistent. Bro, do you even topology?

[cgeorg]

Hold on a fucking second. A pie is a quiche/calzone until sliced, at which point the slice becomes a toast/taco? These examples are logically inconsistent - frankly I don't think a non-starch-topped slice of pie can be classified with this rule. It is therefore invalid.

And if you cut a square, it becomes two triangles or two quadrilaterals. It's not logically inconsistent. Bro, do you even topology?

Does a sandwich, when sliced, become less of a sandwich? Is a sliced calzone not still a calzone?

[Chebass88]

1. SCOPE. A sandwich is the aggregate of at least one piece of bread, at least one topping or condiment, and shall be eaten while held by the hands.

2. APPLICABLE DOCUMENTS - Menus, recommendations from internet forums.

3. REQUIREMENTS. A sandwich shall meet the following requirements:

3.1. First article. When specified, a first article sandwich shall be prepared for me.

3.2. A sandwich shall consist of at least one piece of bread. For the purpose of this specification, bread is defined as a kind of food made of flour or meal that has been mixed with milk or water, made into a dough or batter, with or without yeast or other leavening agent, and baked (REFERENCE). The use of crackers as the sandwich exterior is prohibited, though crackers may be used as an internal ingredient. A cracker is a dry thin crispy baked bread product that may be leavened or unleavened (REFERENCE). Bread may be toasted prior to sandwich construction. Bread that has been toasted or fried until it is crisp is a crouton, and shall be prohibited as a sandwich exterior (REFERENCE), however use of croutons as a sandwich filler is permissible. Multiple pieces are bread are permitted within a sandwich, either as multiple layers (e.g., "the Dagwood"), or as a condiment (e.g., the "Gobbler" sandwich, a sandwich assembled with Thanksgiving leftovers, including stuffing). Examples of bread products include but are not limited to: breads, torpedo rolls, hot dog rolls, snowflake rolls, Hawaiian rolls, dinner rolls, English muffins, croissants, bagels, doughnuts, and biscuits.

3.3. Filling
3.3.1. A sandwich shall contain at least one item of filling. Filling shall consist of any edible item, either plant- or animal-derived. Use of more than one item of filling is permissible. The list of possible fillers and combinations thereof is too long to be defined. The optimum combination of fillers is subjective, and is not included or recommended in this specification.

3.4. Garnishment.
3.4.1. Sandwiches may be garnished either internally or externally.
3.4.1.1. Internal garnishes may be included to aid the tastiness of the fillers (see 3.3). Examples of internal garnishments include (but are not limited to) condiments, vegetables, minerals, and spices.
3.4.1.2. External garnishes may be edible or inedible, and may function to hold the sandwich together (e.g., a frilly toothpick), or to enhance the aesthetic value of the sandwich (e.g., artfully-arranged vegetables). If the garnish is edible, and can be removed without impacting the tastiness of the sandwich, it shall not be considered integral to the sandwich. For example, artfully-arranged cucumber slices on a crustless finger sandwich is considered integral to the sandwich, while a bowl of olives on a tray of tuna sandwiches is not integral to the sandwich.

3.5. Handling. In order to be considered a "sandwich", at least a portion of the combination of items from Sections 3.2, 3.3, & 3.4 shall be capable of being held in the hands for consumption.

3.6. Modifying terms. Sandwiches requiring modifying terms are no-longer considered sandwiches. Prohibited modifying terms shall include: open-faced. Open sandwiches capable of being folded such that it is possible to hold the sandwich in the hands while consuming shall be considered a sandwich. For example, a "gyro" shall be considered a sandwich (it can be held in the hands for consumption), while an open-faced hot roast beef, consisting of a piece of single slice of bread under a pile of roast beef, all of which is smothered in gravy shall not be considered a sandwich.

3.7. Nomenclature.
3.7.1. The sandwich shall be identified by the fillers (see 3.3), in the order of importance. For example, the combination of one-half pound of roast beef, one-eighth pound of Swiss cheese, a decently-sized squeeze of Gulden's mustard, and two slices of bread shall be known as a "roast beef sandwich". If necessary to fully characterize the sandwich, the use of additional terms is permissible. For example, a "roast beef on rye" is a sandwich using rye bread, while a "roast beef sandwich" does not specify the type of bread.
3.7.2. Named sandwiches. Named sandwiches are sandwiches where their composition is known simply by their name. Examples of named sandwiches include (but are not limited to) the "Reuben", the "Rachel", a "Montecristo". Sandwiches may be named by local establishments, however, they shall be described by their fillers and garnishes to a person unfamiliar with the local establishment naming scheme.
3.7.3. Slang terms for sandwiches are also permissible. Examples of slang terms include (but are not limited to) sammies, hoagies, grinders, subs, submarine sandwiches, 'wiches, belly-busters, etc.

3.8. Orientation.
3.8.1 The orientation of the fillers and garnishments shall be in a plane parallel with the greatest planar surface of the bread. For non-planar breads, the bread shall be cut in such a fashion to create the largest planar surface possible, upon which the fillers and garnishes will be placed. For example, if a bagel is to be used as the bread, the bagel shall be sliced in the middle of the toroid shape to create two half-toroids. Slicing the bagel in half such that two "C" shapes are created is prohibited. In addition, merely placing fillers or garnishes through the center of a toroidal shape is strictly prohibited (e.g., the old hot-dog through the bagel routine). Similarly, if a "torpedo roll" is used as the bread, it shall be sliced in a plane parallel to the longest axis. Slicing a torpedo roll in any other plane, for the purpose of using it in a sandwich is prohibited.
3.8.2. The use of a single piece of bread is permissible, provided the bread may be manually folded to contain the filler and garnishes (see 3.6).

3.9. Presentation
3.9.1. Sandwiches may be sliced for ease of eating or presentation. Slicing shall be done in a fashion conducive to consumption. For conventionally-shaped breads, slicing may be on a diagonal, parallel, or perpendicular to the edge of the bread. Sandwiches may be sliced in a creative fashion for aesthetic or annoying purposes.
3.9.2. The removal of bread crust shall not cause detriment to the remainder of the sandwich.

4. VERIFICATION
4.1. First article. When specified, a first article sandwich shall be prepared and eaten by me.
4.2. Examination. All sandwiches shall be thoroughly examined for perceived tastiness prior to consumption. The requirements of Paragraphs 3.2 through 3.9 shall be verified. Verification shall consist of holding the sandwich, giving the sandwich a thorough visual "once-over", followed by consumption. Any sandwich that does not meet the requirements in Section 3 shall be considered cause for rejection.
4.3. Sandwich quality. The quality of the sandwich may be addressed during verification testing (e.g., "This is one TASTY burger!", or "this sandwich tastes like garbage"), however, this is not absolutely necessary.

5. PACKAGING
When specified (see Section 6.2), the sandwich shall be packaged in accordance with standard sandwich packaging requirements.

6. NOTES
6.1. Intended use. Sandwiches will be tasty items, to be consumed by eating.
6.2. Acquisition Requirements. The sandwich acquisition documents should specify the following:
6.2.1. When First article sandwich is required (see 3.1)
6.2.2. Sandwich packaging requirements (see Section 5)
6.2.3. Precise sandwich requirements, if not prepared by the consumer. Examples include type of bread, filler, garnishes, etc.